Looking for joy

The experiment continues.  Anger suppression, subdued, like rice cooking in a too small pot.  I try hard not to boil over, rather I reach to achieve light, soft, fluffiness.

Today we revelled in my search for joy-looking for places to plant gratitude seeds.  We started at the public library.  Just a few more minutes, I tell the boys, I need one more.  I want my full allotment in borrowing other people's knowledge.  Non-fiction, that's my food.  Always searching for that nugget that will result in epiphany.  Then I remember Ann's book, it draws me back, knocks me around, and points me at The Book, and rightly so.

After the library has given me all I can take, we head out to find a new hiking trail.  We hike weekly, taking nature walks to enjoy God's gifts.  Sketchbooks under arms we set off.  Drawing geese first.  Hissing, neck swinging geese.  Will they bite.  Well I have been chased by geese but don't remember being bitten.  They contemplate finding out, scientists not satisfied with hypothesis.  The trail beckons, the geese relax.

32. trees with no leaves
33. oak trees, pine trees, spruce and fir
34 dragon neck branches to ride on

A purple, plastic dragon at the park gets his mouth filled with pea gravel "Look, Mom, it's going to blow fire!"  Sure enough pea gravel spews out, more vomitous than flammable, but still thrilling.  The boys run up the down slide, my boys go up slides when others only go down.

35. thrill of going up a down slide
36+ boys in the river in February, vultures circling, fools gold, flocks of birds in synch
40. strong, callused Man hands
41. toothy smiles