I have learned that I set different standards for different people pots. Some people I give much of myself to and I expect very little, a smile will do. Other people I pour out for and am hurt to the core when I get back next to nothing. I don't know why my expectations are different, but they are.
Much of what we do here involves the broken - families, people, animals, shelters....But I did expected that the umbrella we came to work under would not be broken. We expected strong, firm, support; mentoring, encouragement, love and guidance. I will not go into the details because most of you would not fathom the depth of the cracks in this organization. When I look at the hurts caused by those in 'our' ministry I am amazed; if anyone had told me beforehand I would not have believed that a Christian organization could be so damaging... Naive, I know.
So what have we done in response? I confess that I have been angry, sad, hurt. I gave more weight to the approval of some people than I did to others. In just these past few days I have realized that the people we came here to serve have been amazing! Every Filipino teacher at school has taken time to thank me specifically for help that I gave to them over the year. While our 'leadership' has never bothered to know us, we have been known by those we serve. The families at our outreach site are always so kind. Our community knows us, they see our hearts. I have had to let go and know that the people who invited us here will never know us, they are indifferent to us. But that is their loss. Our gains are so great.
Ethan going sailing with some of the school staff. My grade 4 teaching partner is the first guy.
C with very large pizza on her head. C and I went to pick up the 30 inch pizzas for our staff party, there was no way we could carry them back to the J house. A Caldo's Pizza employee offered to deliver the pizzas for us, 4 30 inch pizzas! on his scooter!
Once the kind scooter pizza guy got the pizza to Angol road, Man carried 3 up the walk to the house, C and the scooter guy delivered the other one to our children.
Pizza and Karaoke at the J house.
The following Saturday my co teacher and I had a bit of a party on the beach for the grade 4 kiddos.
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| Kids on our beach - they always have smiles for us. |
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